It is important to set goals, before you start a
weight loss plan. Those goals
should be realistic and attainable. Starting with a goal of 10 to 20 pounds is a
great place to begin, and is with in your reach.
If you do not think that 20 pounds is a big enough or high enough number, then
think of this way. A bowling ball weighs approximately 10 pounds, now imagine
carrying around two of them all day everyday. If you have 20 pounds to lose,
then that is how much stress and strain that is putting on your body. Losing 20
pounds is a big deal!
WEIGHT LOSS TIPS FOR WOMEN WITH BOWLING BALLS
1. Skip lunch. Eating lunch is difficult with two fourteen pound bowling balls attached to your wrists. So why bother? Place your bowling balls in your lap and think about beets. You will consume zero calories, and the bowling balls will compress your thigh muscles into something resembling a chicken wing. MAXIMUM WEIGHT LOSS . MAXIMUM THIGH GAP.
2. Go for a run. Nothing helps you shed those last twenty eight pounds faster
than a good cardio workout. Nothing, of course, besides surgery to
replace your
bowling balls with human hands. That works, too.
3. Remove your liver. Replace it with feathers.
4. Drink protein shakes. Drink them with a silly straw, because, you know, you
don’t have hands.
5. Buy a new scale. Smash it with your bowling balls and have your care
provider/bowling ball spotter write the number ten (10) on a piece of
paper.
Stand on that. CONGRATS, YOU WEIGH TEN POUNDS. YOU WEIGH LESS THAN THE
SUM OF
YOUR BOWLING BALL PARTS. YOU ARE LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE.
6. Go bowling. You have the hands for it! Plus, what a workout! People will ask
questions, though, so come prepared. Answers like, “I have no hands” and
“I
brought my own balls—I’m attached to them” should do the trick.
7. Remove your head. Replace it with a hollow egg.
8. Don’t eat after 8 pm. Don’t eat before 8 pm either. Instead, drill holes into
your bowling balls. You want dramatic results? THIS IS IT, BABY. Fifty
holes
gets you happiness!
9. Get more sleep. If you sleep at least fourteen hours a night and then cut off
your ankles, you WILL lose weight. Guaranteed.
10. Smash your shins with your bowling balls. Replace them with thin, thin
grains of wheat.
You can lose 20 pounds and do it reasonably. For so many adopting an all or nothing attitude immediately sabotages their efforts because they are unable to achieve their new hardcore ways. If you are there and want to do it that way, then more power to you. I think it is great. For those of you that are not, it is important to realize you can do something! Start small, your efforts will begin to become apparent which provides you with motivation. Motivation means achieving more goals! @Jen's Weight Loss Tips
0 Comment 
